Zoo Station

To the fans of cultural studies/media studies/deconstructionism/post-colonialism and all other isms of the sort, I apologize in advance and you should quit reading this post right away to avoid a bust vein or two.

I have never managed to understand the bullshit that parades under the guise of academic discourse in some of the above-mentioned subjects. The raison d'etre of the mavens seems to be to make up with incomprehensibility what they lack in terms of having anything useful to say. And then there are the disciples who pretend to understand this bullshit. I dare any of you cultural studies mavens to translate this bullshit that came to me via e-mail the other day.

The shrinking dimensions of the shallow screen figure the commodity form not as yearning and desire but as anxiety, a troubled relation with the disavowed past of immersion in zero's aimless satisfaction. Beneath the foreshortened image of space lies the suddenly compressed archaism of the unconscious: beneath these pictures of the nonexistent, the commodity evokes the conflicting temporalities of the nonidentical only to deny them.

In the immortal words of Fatboy Slim, what the fuck? What does this BS mean anyways? I can understand that the person who wrote this was communing with the stars aided by poison of choice when he/she wrote this, but what about the people who discuss this in classrooms in all seriousness and pretend to understand? I think what is required is the humanities version of the web-economy bullshit generator to parse crap like this. Those of you with programming skills and time to kill should seriously consider this suggestion to counter this variety of evil.